How I wish I was in Tehran now. Among friends, family, with people that I love, people who love me. Among the excited and hopeful people, I wanted to be with the crowd. Among those who are desperate to put some food on their tables but they are still loving and nice. They still gather together and share their happiness and sadness. I wanted to be in the middle of the loud noises. Hhhm…. How much I have missed the traffic at 2 am on Vali Asr Street. What am I doing here? How am I going to go through this lonely and long summer? I’m tired of eating all alone. Not having anyone to talk to. No one to go out and enjoy the sun shine. How lonely this life is. I hate my life. I hate this summer. Why did I make such a stupid mistake? Why didn’t I go to Tehran? What do I gain really staying in fucking Vancouver? Taking one course? Nice job! What am I doing ? How can I make this fucking summer more interesting. What do other people do? I don’t know how to handle myself. I don’t know how to handle my rage. I hate everyone, everything. My life. I worked so hard this year. I don’t disserve this fucking summer. How can I help myself? I don’t even know why I should wake up tomorrow morning. I have no desire to see tomorrow. Just to wake up and see that I’m all alone again? And everyone else is with their friends outside. I hate this city. When am I going to get rid of this city? My phone doesn’t even ring. Even if it rings I hate to answer it. There is no one that I would really want to talk to. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to cheer myself up. All the good and productive years of my life is getting wasted in this fucking city. This is the last time I’m staying in Vancouver for summer. But the damage is done. I’m here. I can not go to Tehran. I’m stuck here. How can I make this time good and productive and happy for myself?
0 نظرات:
ارسال يک نظر